The long road ahead...

Be with someone.

Be alone.

It seems that humans are designed to be partnered. Society looks upon the companionless as unusual, outcasts, something to be pondered, studied, and pitied.

Don't believe me? Try it some time.

It is a very real fact that if you go to a concert, the movies, coffee shop or pretty much anything outside of your own house on your own, once people realise they give you that "oh you poor dear" look. I have gotten used to it and get myself out and busy, but sometimes depending on your mood you notice.

I have been in relationships since I was in high school. Until the end of 2008 I had not been out of a relationship for more than a month or so. I have now been out of one for 6 months. I would never have thought it, and argued vehemently against it initially, but it's been a good thing. Difficult, as with any adjustment, but good. I have sorted myself out a lot, gotten a lot of things in perspective.

Perhaps most importantly I now want to be with someone, rather than need to be with someone.

Now this leads me nicely to the source of my recent consternation. I am enjoying my own time, and have actually got myself into a good place. I have a fitness regime and am healthy and happy with how I look. I am mentally good, have a really exciting new job I'm starting soon, finances are sorted and ever improving...all good.

So whilst I'm happy with where I'm at, I feel like I'm ready to be with someone. Not need, but want to. So how do I go about it?

Well popular opinion would have you believe you should "let it happen". I refer the people that tell me that to my prior blog post "Fate and Destiny...". So clearly, I'm not a big believer of that option.

On the other hand I have done the RSVP/websites, Speed Dating, Blind Dates through friends and family. Fail, fail and epic fail. Yes, perhaps I have been unlucky. Regardless I have now sworn off all of this.

So the middle ground is to get out and about, circulate and not be closed off to opportunities. I find it hard to draw that line and given my inherent shyness and inability to approach women, it will be a long hard road but hey, better than nothing.

And then how to find a woman that is not...

a) ...psychopathic.
b) ...just out of a relationship within the last 3 months and still secretly in love with her ex(s).
d) ...a slob and looks after herself.
e) ...so lacking that she struggles to hold a conversation with a housebrick.

So far...well I guess it's early days, patience is not a virtue I naturally possess. You wouldn't think it was that hard...but I'm telling you, it is.